Question: Sunyata, Can you give me tips on how to have a full body orgasm? —from Tim via BlackBerry
Hi Tim, Full Body Orgasms happen most often and with greatest impact when taken by surprise. They sneak up and overtake you, rolling through like a huge wave that keeps on going and going and going—ever expanding through all levels of your consciousness. Instead of chasing after a full body orgasm, try to simply create the best opportunity for it to show up. This is achieved by placing yourself in a state that is both relaxed and aroused, and utterly present in the moment.
Create a Full Body Orgasm Opportunity
A lot of people don’t give sex much thought, it’s instinctual, automatic—just bumping genitals together until they cum, and hopefully both of them do. But, there’s so much more that can be done with sex—in enjoyment, emotional healing, spiritual activating and attuning to, enhanced energetic awareness, and an expansion of consciousness are all possible with conscious, enhanced, spiritual sex.
A Full Body Orgasm is an amazing experience, but it’s amazing not just for its intensity. A Full Body Orgasm is full and intense because of the way that it sweeps through your entire body and doesn’t stay focused on the genitals. Full Body Orgasms are felt going up the back and filling the chest, traveling down the arms and legs and shooting all the way up to the top of the head. A full body orgasm makes the body move in a wave-like motion that can whip or rock back and forth, convulsing uncontrollably—shaking the one under its thrall.
Tantra, or any sex teaching, that focuses primarily on inflating orgasms, or increasing the #s of orgasms, or fixates on the latest sex fad, is superficially treating the depth and meaningfulness that Tantra is capable of teaching us. Pleasure is a part of the Tantric experience, but not for its own sake without a higher purpose which enlightens its adepts in any of the previously mentioned categories.
Full Body Orgasm happens more often when certain conditions are present. Here are some suggestions to follow which will help you create those conditions and invite an opportunity for a full body orgasm to happen:
1. Slow down, breathe, practice “slow sex”
Slowing down lets you be more present in the moment—and that’s the only place where full body orgasms show up! When we’re not in a hurry—chasing after orgasm there is more time to enjoy what is actually happening. There’s no better experience than to be utterly present with exactly what is being experienced in the Now.
Going slow and being present is where you can feel the erotic energy resonance of the experience on a deep, core level of your being. Show up consciously -in the moment- not in a fantasy projection, but with your partner and the pleasure you both are feeling together and allow yourself to fully experience your eros and your partners eros.
2. Relax your body
When nearing orgasm many people tighten up and clench their stomach, butt, and leg muscles. This has the effect of shutting down the flow of sexual energy and preventing a full body orgasm experience! To experience a whole body orgasm, the energy must be able to travel throughout the body uninhibited by tightened muscle contraction. The more relaxed you are—the greater in amplitude the wave of orgasm will be as it reverberates throughout the body.
Relaxed muscles allow energy to flow more freely. Soften the clench in your gut and other muscles and release the isometrically contracted energy to flow easier. When you relax those areas, you might feel a subtle thrill sensation as the energy is allowed to move freely again. Return to relaxing your muscles as often as you realize you are contracting them. You’ll be surprised at how much more you feel and discover that your sexual energy capacity increases when you are relaxed and not in a hurry, chasing an orgasm!
3. Wallow in the Sensation
Wallow, take your time, there’s no place to go, nothing else to do, and no other Now to be in. Plunge deeply into the experience, saturating your consciousness with the multi-dimensional sensing of the sexual activity. Open to the possibility and consciously sustain your experience in your awareness and let your intention be to stay in that state. Release any agendas, expectations, or goals and let the energy swell, and build, and lift you up—instead of coaxing it into a climax.
Hang out and wallow in the feeling-tone resonance of sexual pleasure, doing only what is necessary to sustain the experience without taking it too far into pursuing orgasm. Not that there is anything wrong with orgasm—to the contrary! But there is a big difference between being present and allowing vs looking ahead at the goal and chasing after it.
It’s in the state of wallowing in the sensation of sexual energy where a full body orgasm (FBO) shows up. If partners can avoid the temptation to chase after orgasm and instead invite it to come to them because they’ve attuned and sustained their erotic energy resonance to the same frequency wave as the FBO—the law of attraction will take it from there!
Expand Consciousness without Going Anywhere
Expand, expand your consciousness with the transcendent experience of oneness that results from utter presence and saturated embodied experience. Do this with each sensation of pleasure that you feel. Fully feel each caress, kiss, and gaze as not the observer or observed, but as the experience. Doing this will transcend ordinary linear awareness with its acute, and transient sensation and replace it with a higher, more expansive awareness of your being (a spiritual perspective that also includes carnal, “kama,” pleasure). This enhanced state of being is extra-sensorial and timeless—which is what it means to merge spirit and flesh in sacred sexual embrace.
You are already familiar with the sensation of having your consciousness expanded if you’ve ever said to yourself “Wow, I’m completely blown away by that!” after you saw, or learned something you thought couldn’t happen. It was a fleeting realization at the time, but what if you could make that sensation of expansion last longer and experience it at a deeper level?
Staying in the wonder of an experience instead of letting the mind begin cataloging and judging the experience is the key to maintaining a state of expanded consciousness. Another key accomplishment is to identify with the novelty of the pleasure that is happening (it seems to never get old) and park the mind as a “witness” to felt pleasure, instead of a “doer” chasing after pleasure.
Included with expanded consciousness is the ability to feel pleasure through the experience of your partner’s pleasure—sexual empathy—taking pleasure in your partner experience of pleasure. This makes your sexual pleasure unselfish, and not focused just on you, which causes your awareness of pleasure to expand to include the combined pleasure of both you and your partner. Partners who reach this point will feel each other’s orgasms like they are their own, which creates a more profoundly felt full body orgasm—and more of them felt more often.
Full Body Orgasm Nirvana
Full Body Orgasm opportunities are invited to happen when in a state of Present, Relaxed, Conscious, Unagenda’d, Attuned, and Expanded awareness. When Tantric adepts can experience themselves in this expanded sense, they merge their consciousness and feel the larger, esoteric aspect of who they are. Part of your lover is you as you are your lover—and part of you both is of the universe—the ALL that is.
Love and Light,
What’s your experience with full body orgasms, and how would you describe how they feel? What tips would you add to the ones I list above, to help someone have one? Post your experience below, and leave a comment to join the conversation. Share this post with anyone you know who wants to have full body orgasms. Thanks!
If you are having difficulty experiencing full body orgasm, or you would like more information on this subject—or other subjects like Tantra or Sacred Sexuality or Sexual Healing. Contact me to set up a consultation to see if some coaching with me will be helpful.